Envy is a universal emotion that people experience when others get what they want. Hatred and jealousy wreak havoc on relationships destabilises teams and undermines organizational performance. Most importantly, it harms the person experiencing it. When you are obsessed with the success of others, your self-esteem suffers, and you may neglect or even sabotage your performance and possibly your career.
Hatred and jealousy are tough to control, in part because it is difficult to confess that we are experiencing such a socially inappropriate emotion. Our discomfort compels us to hide and suppress our sentiments, which exacerbates the situation. Envy that has been suppressed for a long time will surely resurface, stronger than before.
Hatred and jealousy are often called a social microscope. You become ruminative when other people’s achievements at work irritate you. You stress about interactions with coworkers, compare your pay, and overthink even the boss’s ephemeral compliments. As you try to strengthen your wounded ego at the expense of your competition, your least generous side emerges.
When we see someone with attributes we admire but can’t easily obtain, such as attractiveness or charm, we tend to discount the worth of such qualities and even mock them. We feel better by downplaying the accomplishments of the person we despise.
People also tend to keep a safe distance from the objects of their envious gaze. Envious people have a hard time learning from and collaborating with others, even when they are friendly competitors. This might cause problems at work, such as delays or omissions.
Perhaps we feel this emotion more intensely when we are close to someone. When a close friend succeeds in a personally relevant domain, people are unhappier than when a stranger succeeds. Strangers are a concept, and their accomplishments are merely statistics. Your close friends’ successes are vivid and seem attainable to you as well.
The goal is to recognise what makes you envious of other people’s situations and qualities. Examine your sensations to see if they disclose what you’re most worried about. Do you resent others who learn new skills faster, make greater wages, or receive accolades from their bosses? You can start managing envious feelings before they turn into counterproductive responses if you precisely understand what triggers them. You can also concentrate on developing yourself in the areas you’ve identified as being most important to you.
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Also Read: How to build a healthy atmosphere at your workplace
