How to deal with emotional blackmail in a relationship

· Recognize the traits

Some traits of blackmailing people are

§ Using manipulative statements to make you feel like something bad will happen if they don’t get what they want.

§ Physical threats are given of harming themselves to force you to do what they want. While the threat is against them, it’s meant to hurt you.

§ They will accuse you of hurting them in some way, even though you haven’t done anything and use your guilt to make you do what they want.

§ They often blame you for the mistakes they’ve made. They hope, blaming you will get them what they want. If you take on the blame, they will manipulate you.

You must recognise all these traits as the way of using your emotions by the person you love. Only when you recognise them, you will be able to deal with it.

· Avoid giving them what they want

To stop falling for emotional blackmailing avoid giving them what they want from you. No matter how much they cry and give you threats of self-harm, you must not give in. When you stop giving what they want, they’ll understand that their trick isn’t working anymore and they’ll slowly stop blackmailing you.

· Let the person know your boundaries

You must first set boundaries, you yourself must know what you are willing to and what you aren’t willing to do in a relationship. After setting boundaries you must convey your limits and their limits to your partner. Let them know the boundaries you’ve set for yourself and also be firm and explain to them that no matter what you won’t cross your limits for any reason.

· Avoid feeling guilty about their actions

Some people are so manipulative that somehow they’ll make you feel guilty about the mistakes they have made. They will also blame you for some petty things you’ve down and will make the entire thing about you. You must, therefore, learn to stop feeling guilty about someone else’s mistake and must stand for yourself. Don’t let anyone manipulate you.