Do you suddenly start panicking when you listen to words like marriage, commitment or forever? If you do, there is nothing wrong with you. You are just one of the many persons who are scared to be in a committed relationship. This is not something you are born with, like the fear of darkness or spiders. These commitment issues are built-in you due to some bad experience in the past or by listening to someone else talk about how committed relationships are bad.
To deal with this fear of commitment you must: –
- Analyse your feelings – Determine the root source of this fear. You may have been in a deeply committed relationship in the past which ended up badly for you and left you to heartbroken, and since then you decided not to be in a committed relationship again. In some peoples cases, they tend to conclude that serious relationships end in heartbreaks by judging someone else’s bad relationships (parents’ divorce, friends break up, etc.).
- Open yourself – You won’t understand how true love feels or works if you don’t allow someone to love you. People who fear commitment tend to keep emotions at bay and sometimes use jokes to cover their true feelings. Do not be like that. If you have feelings for the girl, express them or if you know someone is trying to connect with you emotionally, allow them to do so.
- Be fierce – The best way to deal with fear is to face them head-on. If you fear swimming jump in the pool and you learn swimming. If you fear riding a horse, ride a horse. On every attempt, the fear reduces slowly and finally comes to an end. Similarly, accept the love offered to you and let your emotions out. When you get into a committed relationship, you will understand that it is not what you imagined it will be. It is better!! And it actually makes you happy.
- Take advice – Talk to someone who already is in a committed relationship and ask them to share their experience. Listening to the good part of their relationship can make you think differently and lose the fear.
In the end, if you truly love someone with all your heart, and wish to be with them, this petty little fear of commitment should not be the reason to give it all up. If you enjoy their company and are happy when they are around, go for it. There is nothing more important than being happy!