Your blood is starting to boil, and you’re growing increasingly frustrated as another guy flirts with your girl. Even if you wish to pass on the possessiveness, you can’t just sit back and watch him lavish attention on her. Worrying about your partner isn’t an issue if you have a trusting relationship. Instead, concentrate on the other person and act assertively and gently to inform him that his gestures are inappropriate.
1. Discuss it.
If the flirt is a friend or someone you know well, sit down and talk to him, letting him know how you feel, advises psychologist Irene S. Levine on the website “Psychology Today.” Explain to him that his behavior is inappropriate and unacceptable. It’s possible that he believes his acts are friendly rather than flirtatious. “You’ve crossed the line, and you need to step back and stop flirting with my girlfriend,” say emphatically.
2. Limit the amount of time you and your girlfriend spend with him.
Choose an alternate hangout area if the flirt works at the local coffee shop. If he’s a buddy, begin spending more “alone time” with your girlfriend and reduce group activities until he understands that his behaviors are impacting your relationship with him and with her.
3. Be forceful rather than aggressive.
This is especially important if you don’t know the other person. A friend may realize that you are only defending yourself, whereas a stranger may perceive your actions differently or believe you are looking for a battle. Speak clearly and directly while maintaining cool. Give the other guy some room and avoid getting too close to his face. Avoid using harsh remarks or sarcasm, as these can come out as aggressive. Inform him that you are her boyfriend and that he must leave her alone.
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